Grammie Muriel: A Great Grandchild Remembers

February 25, 2012 - Earlier today I published a blog about our Grammie Muriel. When she read it, Valerie began to recall some very precious memories of her relationship with my grandmother. I want to share them here, for those of you who were priviledged to know Grammie Muriel will surely identify with this. Thank you, Valerie, for sending your thoughts along.

 

Valerie JacobsenFeb 25, 2012 12:49 PM

Grammie went to Heaven when I was 21, and I still miss her. She was a very godly woman with a great heart for encouragement.

Some of the memories that came to my mind reading this....

I remember once that we cousins were playing, chasing each other in her house, through the doorways--living room, kitchen, dining room, living room, kitchen, dining room, living room, kitchen, dining room.... Laughing and screeching and shouting, like kids will do unrestrained.

Our mothers were reprimanding us, and she said, "Now, look, you girls. [I was startled when she called my MOM and my AUNT "girls."] You did it when you were little, and this is my house, and they can do it, too. If you can't handle it, just run along and go shopping. I'll take care of the kids."

As I recall, our mothers did go shopping that day!

~ ~ ~

I couldn't visit either Grammie Ruth or Grammie Muriel without either of them saying, "Now, does Grammie have anything you need, dear?"

~ ~ ~

I had wonderful times going to antique stores and flea markets with Grammie Muriel, and sometimes Aunt Iola. Grammie's influence and encouragement in my love of history and old artifacts is one of the things that led me to become a bookseller.

She once gave me a 19th century photo album packed with old photographs and a few tintypes of unknown people. I treasured it, and eventually sold it on eBay to help my family.

~ ~ ~

She had the most wonderful and interesting house I've ever visited. The pictures in my mind are vivid. Always things to look at, and she would never forbid us to touch.

~ ~ ~

She had the best, most fun toy drawer for little kids. Many of the tiny toys in there were very old, and all were entrancing.

~ ~ ~

Molasses taffy

~ ~ ~

From the time I turned 15: "Well, I met your grandfather when I was 15, and we married when I was 16, and I was pregnant when I was 17. Don't you have a boyfriend yet?" And then lots of laughter!

~ ~ ~

The very last time I ever played with a baby doll, I was at her house, and I was 12.

~ ~ ~

I remember how cordial and kind she was to a man who was carrying a cross a very long distance, as some kind of evangelistic effort. She spotted him walking and invited him to eat. I was young, but I remember getting the impression that this man was a bit of an oddball, but to my grandmother, that was a chance for joy, someone else to love, and one more chance to talk about Jesus.

~ ~ ~

I loved catching frogs from the pond behind her house. I was _scared_ of Uncle Lawrence's big pond, though.

~ ~ ~

I remember crawling up her inside stairs and feeling nervous and afraid, and a man (I think my father) encouraging me that I could do it. I would guess I was about two. I have a couple of memories from about that time.

~ ~ ~

My grandmother was always _interested_. She was interested in seeing, hearing, knowing. What fascinated us, fascinated her. She wanted to hear all about whatever we needed to tell.

~ ~ ~

[On recalling the road trip from Machias to Littleton, she wrote:]

And just the joy of watching those last few landmarks and finally spotting her house. It was like the borderland for our people.

Grammie Muriel: Always On Our Side

Feb 25, 2012: The other night I was talking with Matthew Kervin about Grammie Muriel and we spoke about how she was such a great advocate for children -- perhaps to a fault. Matthew said, "I was never found guilty of anything."

Having a heart for children was part and parcel of who she was. She grew up as the oldest of ten children. And after her mother died, my great grandfather married again and fathered six more childen. I can remember some of her younger siblings saying, "Muriel was the only mother I ever knew." And they were as beloved to her as if they were her own children.

Mom said that when she was in elementary school she took her brother Glen to classes every day and cared for him while she was doing her lessons. Farm life was a wonderful life for children, but it was difficult. Cattle and crops do not wait until you have time for them. When it is time to tend them, it is time. It doesn't matter what the weather is doing or whatever else might be more fun. Work was done when the circumstances required it. And little children have needs that must be met, even when you are busy. By the time my grandmother was married at the age of sixteen, she had the skills necessary to manage a household and help with duties on the farm.

As she began to have children of her own, she required chores of them. But in some ways she was lenient with her children and took more upon herself so they could enjoy being children. For example, she limited the number of dishes her girls had to wash. She only had three children, but she could remember the drudgery of washing dishes for a family of ten children and as many farm hands or Sunday dinner guests might be at the table on a given day. She never wanted her daughters to feel that way about washing dishes!

She did not teach my mother and Aunt Iola how to milk a cow or dress a chicken. Her stated reason was "if they don't learn how, they will never have to do it." By contrast, several of the grandchildren learned how to dress a chicken and milk a cow! We loved it and I am sure she realized it was more like recreation than work to us. The world was changing, and she could see that.

Mom says she cannot imagine how Grammie allowed her and her siblings to take a picnic lunch and walk to Cary Lake for a swim. But they did it without incident. I said, "Mom, the world was a safer place then." And she replied, "yes, but the lake was just as deep." That is true!

Andrea and I -- and perhaps some of the others -- remember Gram making a beautiful chocolate cake with boiled icing. The icing was just like fudge on the cake. And being impatient kids, we would ask if we could pick off some icing. There were times that we ate ALL of the icing off the cake and Grammie just cooked up another batch, refrosted the cake, and served it to our Grandfather. He probably never knew the difference.

When we were teenagers, our parents must have been very pleased that our favorite hang-out was at our grandparents' home. Our grandfather had hugs and greetings for us, but he wasn't as sociable as our grandmother. Grammie has been known on many occasions to get out of bed and entertain her grandchildren and their friends. We would play Rook, eat popcorn or whatever else she had on hand, laugh and talk, and just enjoy companionship until midnight or later. I've seen her take a chicken out of the freezer, thaw it in her microwave, and take it out of the oven at 1 o'clock. Amazing!

Besides the fun and the social life, our grandmother was deeply involved in our spiritual lives. Every conversation ultimately turned to the Lord Jesus. She helped us memorize Bible verses. She taught us to pray. She shared the Gospel with us. She lived like Christ before us. She was there when I trusted in Jesus Christ as my Savior. Her example is burned into my heart. I wish I could be just one half the grandmother that she was.

Her nurturing and mentoring were not limited to her children and grandchildren. But her loving heart reached out to siblings, nieces & nephews, cousins, neighbors, members of the Church. Wherever she was, the hand of God was reaching out to others through her. Peers who went to the Lake Road Church when I was young were also encouraged by my grandmother to pray. When were were in prayer meeting, she could be heard during a pause calling one of our names to pray. And that is how we learned to pray in public, something that seems to be difficult for many people. At the time, we didn't always appreciate the way she pushed us, but we do now!

Mom was telling me the other night about Grammie's winter in Houlton. There was no public transportation for the kids to go to high school and one, particular winter our grandmother rented a place in Houlton and appointed herself as a surrogate parent -- a dorm mother. She had her own children there and many others. Mom was trying to count up all the teens who lived in that house for the winter and she came up with about 15 or more kids from all over Littleton and Monticello. They paid $10 a week apiece and some groceries to help with expenses. Can you imagine single-handedly keeping track of that many teens? Mom says that several of those people have told her that their winter with my grandmother was one of the highlights of their lives. I believe it!

When it came time for my mother to go to college, my grandfather thought that was totally unnecessary. Of course, she was a girl and would probably be a stay-at-home Mom and he thought she didn't need it. The economy was really bad at the time, with World War II looming on the horizon. I can understand his position. But Gram was an advocate for her child, who wanted to go to college. So she scrubbed floors, did laundry, worked in any way she could to help pay for my mother's tuition.

One thing I remember is large gatherings at various family homes for holidays or Sunday dinners. Whenever there were too many people for the table space in those days, the men generally ate first and then the women and children. Not at Grammie's house! Children were served first. My heart was impacted by that because it made me feel very important in her eyes. And, of course, I was important to her. All of us were. Grammie was always on the side of children, showing genuine love and concern for each and every one. I am thankful for having a godly grandmother, who loved me unconditionally in the good times and in the hard times.

__ Pictured above are Grammie Muriel and Grampie Ellery with my brother Brian and sister Carla. We think this picture was from 1957.

A Child's World in the 1920s and 30s

Grandchildren, the world in which Grammie Ruth, Uncle Lawrence, and Aunt Iola lived as children was a galaxy away from the world where you live today. Try and imagine it:

^ Children had no television or video games, but there were stories and music to be heard on the radio.

^ Man had not gone to the moon and only dreamed of it in science fiction tales and comics.

^ There was no McDonald's, Burger King, or Kentucky Fried Chicken. People rarely ate french fries. And nobody in Aroostook County had ever heard of pizza!

^ Movies were in black and white, never in color.

^ Dads made $7 a week or less and most mothers were at home working. Grammie Muriel did laundry, cooking, and housecleaning for those who could afford such luxury. It cost 25 cents or less for a gallon of gas (I know that because I can remember when gas was 25 cents a gallon in the 1940s). When you could afford to by an ice cream cone, it was 5 cents. Mothers made many of the clothes their children wore. Hats, scarves, and mittens were often made at home. There were no disposable diapers for babies. Those were made of flannel -- usually hand-sewn -- and were washed for re-use. Most baby food was made at home. And mothers usually nursed their babies. When a bottle was needed, there were no fancy bottles. Mothers usually bought packages of rubber nipples that would stretch over the opening of a soda bottle.

^There were not automatic washing machines or dryers. Clothing was hung outside or on racks indoors to dry. Everything had to be ironed because there was no "permanent press".  My grandmother used to make her own laundry soap.

^ Many people still traveled in horse-drawn vehicles. And those who had cars could drive at a top speed of about 45 miles per hour. In the earlier days of the automobile, drivers did not have to be licensed. By Grammie Ruth's time, one needed a driver's license. She remembers Uncle Lawrence going with her to Caribou for the test and learning to drive along the way. She didn't realize there was a test over the laws, but when she got there the officer gave her the book to study for about ten minutes. So much for driver's education in the 1930s! She passed, but the officer told her he was only giving her a license because he never wanted to ride in a car with her again. That must have been a tough pill for my Mom to swallow.

^ Many houses in rural areas did not have electricity or running water. That meant lighting the house with candles or oil lamps. Some people had gas lights, but that was rare. That meant no refrigerator, so they had to use ice boxes. People would cut chunks of ice from the lakes (hard work) and stack them in a building or even outside. They were covered with sawdust to keep them from melting too quickly. I remember being amazed at Grampie Jim's ice blocks still available in the summer. They were melting and the sawdust was wet, but he was still able to go out and get some ice for use in the ice box.

^ Most houses had no furnace, and in the winter time it was very cold in the morning before the fire was restarted in the stove. In those days, children could "see their breath" inside the house on a cold morning. They would grab their clothing and dress under the covers quickly, then run downstairs and stand near the stove to be warm. On mornings like that, there was heavy frost on the windows much like frosted windows on cars that have been parked outside on cold nights.

^ Coke and soft drinks were available, but people didn't drink them very much. There was not as much junk food. But what kids loved to do was stop at the store and buy "penny candy". The various candies were a penny apiece and some were even two or three for a penny! But they didn't have money to buy that very often, either. Treats at home were more often popcorn, fudge, cookies, and cakes.

^ Children didn't hang around the house. They were usually found outside, summer or winter. They played games of tag, kick the can, capture the flag, king of the mountain, hide and seek, red light - green light, cops and robbers, and other things that took few or no pieces of athletic equipment. As children still do, they liked to build snowmen and snow forts in the winter. And they played a tag-like game called fox and geese. Of course, they rode bikes, used sleds, skis and toboggans. They played baseball or soft ball in good weather. A basket ball hoop on the side of someone's barn was a rare luxury.  At night or on rainy days, children played games with their family: Button, Button; guessing games; card games; puzzles. And they listened to the radio or to the record player.

^ Reading was very important. Parents read to their children in the evenings from the Bible, Classical Books, magazines, or children's books. The comics in the paper were beloved as cartoons on television were to later generations. As children got older, they read from the various series available -- Ruth Fielding, the Hardy Boys, and others.

^ Children always had chores. In my mother's case, the children helped feed the chickens, shovel the snow, and weed the gardens. Mom tells how Grammie Muriel used to assign garden rows for weeding and how the children had to finish their jobs before they could play. It seems Uncle Lawrence had a Tom-Sawyer-like place in his neighborhood. Some of the boys didn't have as many chores at home and they tended to show up to get "Walkie" (Uncle Lawrence) to play with them. He steadfastly refused to leave his work and so the desperate boys pitched in and helped him finish his weeding so they could play with their friend. My mother remembers watching with dismay as the guys ran off to play and she still had work to do.

^ Usually elementary schools had only one or two rooms and in the country, most of the children walked to school or their parents drove them. Your great grandmother and her siblings walked about a mile to school. And when they arrived in the winter time, the school was very cold. The teachers was already there and (she, usually) was building the fire in a wood or kerosene heater. Until the room was warm enough, the children gathered around the stove to keep warm. It may interest you to know that in 1949 when I started school, it was at the same, two-room school house that my mother and her brother and sister had attended. It still had a wood stove, no running water, and an "outhouse" attached to the woodshed (so no bathroom). The teacher kept water in a tea kettle for when we wanted a drink or needed to wash our hands. When they ran out of water, one of the older boys was sent to her house to fill it again.

^ Children had "opening excercises" in school. That included Bible reading, the Lord's prayer, the flag salute, singing "My Country 'Tis of Thee", and maybe some other songs. Teachers often inspected the children for clean nails -- and periodically for head lice. The children were taught "The Golden Rule" -- that is a saying of Jesus, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." Children had outdoor play at recess time twice a day and after lunch unless it was raining, then some indoor games and exercise gave the children a break.

^ Children had to wear shoes to school -- no tennis shoes or sneakers. Those were for sports or work. Girls were required to wear skirts or dresses. Boys had to wear regular pants, no jeans. Denim was for work, not for school. In the winter, since they walked to school, children usually wore ski pants over their regular clothes but those were removed and left hanging on a hook until it was time to go out for recess or go home.

^ Most families went to Church together, and even those who did not seemed to be respectful of the fact there is a God. I remember some men smoking and swearing. But in general, people used polite language -- sometimes potty language was to be heard, but the very rude language used so freely today was not heard. And if kids were caught swearing at school, they were punished for it. Back then, teachers used a ruler on the palm of the hand or on the bottom.

^ Nobody was abusing drugs or alcohol in school. And there were not such social problems among boys and girls in elementary school and early high school. Children were allowed to be children and did not live with the drama that we see all around us today.

Today, you have privileges that your great grandparents, your grandparents, and even your parents did not have. And you have many challenges that we did not face. Oh, kids got in trouble because they were sinners, too, but not to the extent that we see today. My advice to you is this: 1. appreciate your privileges but do not abuse them.
2. stand up to the challenges, but do not try to do it alone. You have God and your parents to help you. 3. Root your life in the Lord Jesus, read the Bible, go to Church, and live by what you learn. 4. Love your neighbor as yourself and don't be selfish. Remind yourself that you are not the center of the universe.

We love you and pray for you. And we want you to know we are here for you if you ever want to talk or if you have a need.

-- Pictured above is Uncle Lawrence and other children in the Harrigan School, Littleton. He is the outstanding blonde boy in the middle of the picture! I'm guessing this was taken around 1930 when he was seven.

Grandma Buza Described Herself

The main text of this page was written by Grandma Buza when she was 89 years old.

In it, she mentions her preference for dresses. Grandma always had a pretty dress, a nice sweater, a scarf, and attractive pin, and just looked clean, neat -- and stunning, actually.

I believe dressing modestly and in lady-like clothing was one of her most endearing qualities. This was Grandma's way, all of her life!

Gramp and I both love to see a woman dressed in feminine outfits that are not only beautiful, but modest. We believe this is both charming and respectful -- of men, in particular. We saw a presentation a couple of years ago where a 17 year old guy said he really appreciates girls who respect him enough to wear appropriate clothing that does not give him wrong thoughts. Interesting perspective, isn't it!

We think the most attractive women are beautiful on the inside first -- a sweet and gentle spirit, a smile, and the ability to walk like a lady. So, dear grandaughters, we hope you decide to focus on the aspects of beauty that will always last.

A little make-up? Sure! But not a paint job. A woman who wears makeup to look clean and natural knows how to enhance her own beauty and doesn't try and turn herself into something she is not. Her makeup won't clash with the clothing she wears.

Dress is SO important! Something that fits well and protects your privacy is outstanding to everyone.  I heard a stranger recently say, "where is that poor girl's mother?" I looked and could see why. Frankly, too much skin might be "in" but it leaves the wrong message.

The Preacher's Son, My Father

February 21, 2012

I haven't seen my father since November 7, 1956 when he arrived home from work. He left the next morning, as usual, before I was up.  He traveled to the Loring Air Base in Limestone and went about his duties making deliveries for O'Donnel's Express. In the afternoon he was working on the restricted area of the base, where he was mortally wounded in an accident with his truck. There were no witnesses. What we know is that he was run over by his own truck, found and taken to the base hospital where he died from the injuries. There was suspicion of foul play, but our mother was never given the results of the investigation that we know occurred. That final story is in God's hands. And while our loss was acute and keenly felt, we also realize that God never makes a mistake. We have rested in that.

Our father didn't have very long to know his own dad, Rev. Clifford Burpee Cain. But I am sure he was much beloved by his preacher dad and prayer warrior. I am sure that his spiritual journey was largely in response to the prayers of his godly father.

Mom says that my father trusted Christ when he was a teenager. I remember how he loved the Word of God. Hearing him read the Bible aloud, while lying on his bed is one of the good memories I have of him. Seeing him and my mother kneeling in prayer, holding hands, and knowing they were praying for their children is a vision that has remained with me to this day.

As a baby and toddler, Paul Clifford Cain was taken to the West Road Church in Monticello. His father was ordained there and only lived until the year after his ordination when he died from tuberculosis of the spine. My grandmother was left as single mom of three children: Dorothy, Geneva, and her little son. Another girl had died as a young child from a "blood disease".

In time, my two aunts married sons of Bill Nason, their own father's dear friend. These two couples: Merle and Dorothy Nason & Vernon and Geneva Nason were godly people who always supported the Church and witnessed faithfully for Christ. They were a great influence on my father and mother, especially since the women were my father's sisters and the men were my mother's uncles!

I do not know how or when it happened, but my grandmother drifted away from her Church life and ended up marrying an unsaved man. They had three daughters, greatly beloved aunts to me: Norma, Barbara, and Ella. After a great number of years, my grandmother's second husband (Grampie Harley Simms) trusted in the Lord Jesus as his savior. My grandmother had returned to her Christian life and faithfully attended the Lake Road Church for worship and prayer services as long as she was physically able.

As a teenager, my father walked to the Pentecostal Church on the Muckatee Road in Monticello, as did some of his friends. It was apostolic in theology and he found it disappointing. It is unclear how frequently he attended Church at that time in his life, but as a young married man he attended the United Baptist Church in Littleton with my mother. After family and friends re-opened the Lake Road Church in Monticello, my Dad became active there as song leader and lay preacher.

Our Dad had memorized lengthy portions from the Bible. I remember when brother Clifford was only two years old and in the high chair, he had learned some passages from our Dad. The one I most remember was John 14:1-6. Dad loved to hear that little boy voice reciting the Word. It was a great joy to him.

My father had a marvelous singing voice, and as I became proficient at the piano he used to like me to play and sing with him. One of his favorites was "Heavenly Sunshine" and another was "The Love of God". My mother had those two songs sung at his funeral on November 11, 1956.

Besides his service at Lake Road, our father served as interim pastor at Plaster Rock and Lerwick, New Brunswick. Mom traveled to those Churches with him and played the organ. I dimly remember some of those trips.

--- This picture is of my father when he was a teenager.

I'll Go Where You Want Me to Go, Dear Lord

Maybe you have heard me say, "all of this is temporary."  That means that this world and all it has to offer will be gone someday. It means that whether we live to be 40 (as my Dad did) or if you live to be 90 and beyond as my mother is, please be sure that you spend those years, that energy, the life that God has given you in ways that will make a difference for the better.

So many times I have thought -- and said -- wouldn't it be wonderful if our children could learn from what we have experienced and seen in this life? Wouldn't it be wonderful if they would decide to listen to us, take our advice, and have a happier life journey?

Grandchildren, I am writing this blog to you because I want you to consider the value of living a life that is pure and devoted to the Lord. Someone has said "only one life, 'twill soon be past; only what's done for Christ will last."

Let me place before you the story of my mother and her spiritual journey.Certainly, I cannot see her heart and tell you all that is there. But I can do this: I can tell you what she has said to me and I can tell you what I have seen in her. Is she perfect? NO. Have I ever been disappointed in her? YES. Am I sorry she is my mother? NO. Has she been a good example for me to follow? YES.

My mother -- Ruth Geraldine Watson (pictured above at the age of 13) cannot remember a time when she did not hear about the Lord Jesus and about His love for her. Her mother taught her Bible verses and songs (in an off key voice) about our Lord and God. She told me today that she first remembers going to Church when she was only four. She walked about a mile to the Littleton United Baptist Church and attended Junior Church, taught by Lily Shaw -- a very dear friend of Grammie Muriel.

It was in Junior Church as she heard continually of the love of God that her little heart first trusted in Christ. She always loved going to Church and even when children were sick at home she walked and very rarely missed a Sunday. She said that when she was nine years old the pastor spoke to her about what it means to be a Christian and she knew she wanted to be baptized.

Her baptism was at Cary Lake (and that is where I was baptized, also at the age of nine). She said she will never forget that day. As she came out of the water the Christians gathered on the shore were singing, "I’ll go where You want me to go, dear Lord, O’er mountain, or plain, or sea; I’ll say what You want me to say, dear Lord,
I’ll be what You want me to be." She said those words are burned into her heart even to this day. She took them seriously and lived her life by them.

By the time she was in high school, my mother was teaching a Sunday School class. At her Church she became active in a youth group called "Christian Endeavor" (CE) and became the president. She attended CE conferences at the state level and was a speaker at some of the meetings. In high school at Ricker Classical Institute in Houlton she was involved in Christian organizations. When she graduated with an honor part the topic of her speech was "Keeping Religion in America". At Ricker Junior College she continued in her Christian groups and activities.

She began to date my father, Paul Cain.  His sisters and brothers-in-law were active with the Primitive Baptist denomination and the young couple began to attend quarterly meetings of the denomination. At that point the Lake Road Church had been closed for awhile, but after my parents married they participated with other family members in the reopening of the Church for worship. Mom became the first adult Sunday School teacher and became the Church clerk, a position which she held for over sixty years. She did service as the Church organist for awhile and over the years she has served on several boards and committees.

My mother was involved in youth ministry, especially after she was widowed at the age of 34. She taught a boys' Sunday School class, planned and directed VBS, directed camps at the Saint John Valley Bible Camp, and held a number of different leadership roles in the Youth Temperence Council, Word of Life club and AWANA club. She developed and taught the Junior Church program for a number of years.

Mom was involved in women's ministries, too: the Church ladies' aide, women's fellowship,  and the Women's Christian Temperance Union. One thing I saw her do was make fruit and baked goods to distribute to the elderly at Christmas. That tradition continued until some of the "elderly" were younger than she!

When I was a teenager the doors of our home were always open to my friends. Some of us had a great time playing our musical instruments in the living room, playing board games, making popcorn, and just "hanging out". 

She was involved in Brownies and Girl Scouts, ensured that we had piano lessons, burned the midnight oil with me when I was working on essays for English class, and many other things to enrich and benefit our lives. One thing I will never forget is the beautiful dress that she made for me to wear to a Christmas concert by my high school glee club. It was bright read taffeta with nylon netting. I felt so "fancy" and so loved that night, for nobody had such a beautiful dress as I.

In my mother, I observed a woman who has the heart of a servant. She was always doing things for us, for the Church, for family members, for neighbors. She has always been a woman of the Book, studying with commentaries, concordances, correspondence Bible training, and even some random courses at New Brunswick Bible Institute.

I watched her be a single mother for a time, saw her grief at being widowed, observed her frugal life style, loved her creativity, appreciated her hospitality, learned from her work ethic, and admired her gift of being thankful in all circumstances even when they were hard.

Someday my mother will change her address from earth to Heaven. She will see Jesus face to face and she will meet His eyes and hear His voice as He says, "well done, good and faithful servant." I want to hear those words spoken to me. And I want you to hear them spoken to you. Dear ones, nothing this world has to offer can hold a candle to what Jesus has in store for those who love Him! Go, Do, and Be what He  wants for YOU, too. "It will be worth it all when we see Christ."

Our Christian Roots

We are a wealthy family. Yes, we are rich -- not in the world's goods -- but we have an heritage that is bountiful. Its scope is beyond our ability to describe. Our Christian roots grow deep.

We don't know when our Christian roots were first planted. There is evidence in our history to support the idea that the DeGrasse ancestors in the Nason line were French Hugenots -- saints of the Lord Jesus Christ. True or not, we are sure of one thing: those of us who have been adopted into the family of God were chosen in Christ before the foundation of the world. He knew us before the world began. Our roots grow deep -- from before the beginning of time. What can we say about such grace, such love! We are inadequate to understand our Christian roots, and we are unable to thank Him enough for we are "unworthy of the LEAST of His favor".

This blog will mostly talk about the Cains and Nasons. Here is more of what my mother shared with me on February 20, 2012:

My mother's grandfather George Wilmot (Bill) Nason and my grandfather Clifford Burpee Cain were best of friends. Both lived in Monticello, Maine in the early years of the 20th Century. Bill was a farmer and woodsman. Cliff was a minister of the Gospel. Both were Christians.

Mom said that Grammie Muriel told of her father (Bill) that when he became a Christian he immediately began to have family devotions in the home. He gathered his wife Jessie (Murphy) and his ten children in a circle and began to read to them, starting in the Book of Revelation. Grammie Muriel said her little siblings were frightened at some of the things being read to them. We wonder why -- instead of starting with creation or the life of Christ -- he began his family readings in what may be the most difficult book in the Bible to understand. But we appreciate so very much his resolve to share the Word with his family. What an example to emulate!

Cliff Cain studied at Providence Bible Institute in Rhode Island. This school was later known as Providence Barrington Bible College and finally as Barrington College. When the college closed its doors in the 1980s, its extensive collection of Bibles was donated to the library at Pensacola Christian College, where Valerie and Kevin earned their degrees. Grampie Clifford was ordained to the ministry in 1917 at the West Road Primitive Baptist Church (interior is pictured above) and in 1918 when my father was only 2 years old, he died of tuberculosis of the spine.

Much of the friendship between Bill and Cliff centered around fellowship and ministry at the Lake Road Church, a sister Church to the West Road. West Road was the home Church of Clifford and Catherine (Grammie Kitt Miller) Cain. Lake Road was the home Church of the Nason clan: Bill's family and his father David's family. It was also the home Church of the Andrew Murphy family -- Grammie Jessie's family. The congregations met together for quarterly meetings with other Primitive Baptist Churches in New Brunswick. Those were great times of fellowship.

The Nason family, the Murphy family, and other neighbors on and near the Lake Road met in the school house for several years. But it was a mission in the hearts of our forebears to have a Church meeting house of their own. Bill and David cut wood and Bill milled it for constructing the building, which was completed around the year 1916. My mother's great grandfather David purchased the steeple bell (which Grampie Wayne and I rang at our wedding). Mom believes that her great grandfather lived to be 90 years old and after his funeral the bell was tolled once for every year of his life. She said people in Monticello village, a few miles away claimed that they could hear the bell. Grammie Jessie (Murphy) Nason's dad purchased the beautiful pulpit, which is still in use today. Jessie sewed the first pulpit curtains that hung between the pulpit and posts on either side of it. Grammie Muriel, just a teenage, walked all over Monticello soliciting gifts to pay for the reed organ. I remember my mother playing that organ when I was young. Brother Clifford would sit on her lap with is little hands on the backs of her hands and "help" her play for the services. This is the organ that I started playing for Church services when I was only ten. A child had to work very hard to pump the old organ in order to get a smooth flow of music from it. It was hard work, but the music was beautiful.

It must have been a time of great rejoicing when the Church was opened for Sunday School and worship. Circuit riding ministers from New Brunswick traveled to Lake Road to preach, as did Clifford Cain and another preacher Hartt from Monticello. When there was no guest minister, Bill Nason would take his Bible and mount the steps to the pulpit. There he would read to the people. He was poorly educated and unable to read very well. Whenever he stumbled over a word someone in the congregation would prompt him. As he read the Word and taught the people, Bill Nason became a proficient reader.

Mom wishes she knew more about our Grandfather Clifford -- my Dad's father. The most precious treasure we have from him is the fact that he set aside one night of every week to pray for the generations that would follow him. We believe that we see answers to his prayers in our own lives and in the lives of all his descendents who have trusted in Christ as Savior over the years.

As I said before, God called him home at the age of 42. Known as a man of prayer even by people I met during my teen years, he left us an example for us to follow. We also must be people of prayer! Grammie Kitt was with him when he died. She said that as he lay dying, she heard a voice, "Clifford, are you coming?" He raised his hand, answered in the affirmative and passed into the presence of Jesus, which is "far better".

I knew Grampie Bill. We had his kitchen table in our kitchen when I was growing up. I liked him a lot. He died of cancer when I was a child and I remember when the call came from Bangor telling my grandmother of his passing. Of course, I never knew Grampie Cliff. I look forward to meeting him. I look forward to thanking him for praying for ME, for my husband, for my children, and for so many others.

As I said, we are very wealthy people!

Note: pictured in the pews nearest are Bethany and Christopher Sykes with Kyle and Timothy Harmon. Behind them you can see me (Brenda) and Wayne Buza. In the next row is Zachary Cain (the second Clifford's son).

A Stellar Day For My Mom

Today -- February 19, 2012 is my mother's 90th birthday. She was born on a Sunday, she said -- a beautiful, sunny day.

The day she was born was much like today, weather-wise. But the world is a vastly different place than it was almost a century ago.

When she was very young, much of the travel was still done by horse and wagon or horse and sleigh. But the Model T Ford was available from the time her Dad was a young teenager.

My grandparents used a kerosene lamp to light the home at night. Wood was used for heat and cooking. There was no indoor plumbing. Their farming was done with a pair of horses, Rowdy and Chub.  Families in Aroostook County were pretty self sufficient except for a few staples that were purchased twice a year, or so: flour, molasses, sugar, salt, and such. Lard was sometimes purchased to use as shortening, but sometimes even that was made at home.

Yesterday Mom was truly the life of the party at our house in Glenburn. Before the day was over, 30 family members had attended the open house in her honor. She enjoyed the food, the gifts, the cards, the cake, the singing of "Happy Birthday" (and she even directed the choir). But most of all she enjoyed the people. At one point she told us that she was in her second childhood. "Now that I am ninety, I can do whatever I want to and get away with it", she said. Then she modified that declaration by saying that when she was young she had to listen to her parents but now she has to listen to her kids.

Today she told me she loves being 90 because she is feeling better than in a long time. And she is looking so WELL. She was in the hospital for a week before the party day and we thought she would be very weary after the festivities, but she had a ball. Usually after a busy day, she is exhausted. But not this time! I think some of her newly found stamina is directly related to the iron therapy she had in the hospital. But I think part of it was from the joy she felt, just being with the family that she loves -- having so many of us together.

You can see pictures of Mom and some tidbits of her life at a site I am working on:  http://imageevent.com/bbuza/familypictures/mymom .  This is a work in progress, so you might want to check it from time to time and look at the other images I have there so far if you would like.

In July I will be 69. What an amazing thing to still have my Mom at this age. I thank the Lord for that blessing, and hope to not take it for granted. She told me today that she will still be here to celebrate our 50th wedding anniversary in August of 2013. I believe her.

February 20th: Grammie Ruth just told me that you should know that Grampie Ellery had the first truck in Littleton. It was a Model T.  He bought the "innards", seat and steering wheel and built it into a truck. He crafted a wooden cab and body. Other than a windshield, it had no windows. Mom remembers that she and Uncle Lawrence would sit on old car seats on the back of the truck and ride to Bangor.

Because there were no sideboards on the body of the truck,  Mom and her brother sat with their backs against the driver's seat and passenger seat. Aunt Iola sat on Grammie Muriel's lap. The trip took many hours, she said. I personally remember that Gramp's driving speed was 35 mph, whether it was posted 25 or 45! His concept of a left turn was to angle across the pavement from several yards away (I was horrified).

Growing Old With No Children Is Lonely!

When I was a young mother, I worked at the old Lincoln Hospital for a week while the hospital administrator / medical technologist (one and only) went on the first vacation he had taken in many years. Grammie Ruth kept Valerie and Stephen and your Grampie worked in Machias that week.

There wasn't much lab work to do in that tiny hospital with a nursing home wing. So when I finished my lab work for the day I went to the nursing home to do some volunteer work as companion to patients who had no visitors. One woman was around ninety. She had never married and had no children. She was sad and lonely. I combed her hair and talked to her and she loved the attention. She showed me a picture of herself and three other people. They had come to see her, but she didn't know who they were. The nurses told me they wanted a picture and had never been there before or since. Sad!

Our family has been SO blessed with children -- beautiful children! We are thankful for every one of you. We believe that YOU are God's gifts to us. And we hope to never be lonely in our old age.

This is Samuel Buza giving his Mom a kiss.

The love of a child is precious beyond words.

And this boy KNOWS he is loved and cherished by his parents.

The Bible tells us to bring our children up in the "nurture and admonition of the Lord".  It also says that if we train a child in the way he should go that when he is old, he will not depart from it. We are thankful that our sons and daughters are parents who share their faith and the love of God with our grandchildren. Here Jonathan is teaching Robert -- a boy who loves to learn from his parents.

The song goes, "How sweet to hold a newborn baby. . ." And it is!  Each and every one is precious -- and special in some wonderful way. Kyle is quiet, but very tender hearted. He never forgets to give us a "hello hug" when we see him. When he was in elementary school, he wrote a paper about his future and at that time he thought he ought to be a missionary to New York or some other place (I forgot which state it was). What I do hope is that no matter WHERE he and his siblings and cousins go they will remember to tell others about the God who loves them! What a blessing to think about grandchildren becoming men and women of God.

Are You Thinking of Marriage?

To our beloved Grandchildren --

On August 27, 2013 -- if Gramp and I live that long -- we will celebrate fifty years of marriage. I am writing this because we live in a culture where about half of the marriages end up in divorce.  That is so sad because we know that marriage is meant to be between a man and a woman for life -- that was God's plan and it is still His plan. But people really mess up and I don't know all the reasons for marriages not lasting "til death parts you".

One of the things that people do wrong is that they don't have a realistic view of marriage to start with! Marriage is not a continual romantic trip. A GOOD marriage is a result of VERY hard work. It is a result of people understanding that THEY are not the center of the universe. In marriage you love, you share, you forgive, you set good goals, and most of all you invite someone else into your relationship -- that someone else is the LORD.

When I was a teenager someone very wise told me: "you cannot help who you fall in love with." But you CAN HELP who you spend time with. And while you aren't always on an active HUNT to find a husband or wife, you can rule out certain types as friends of the opposite sex. The red flags should go up when another person who: 1. Is not a Christian (a true believer in the Lord Jesus) or is a Christian who does not put the Lord and His will ahead of himself or herself; 2. Always wants his or her own way; 3. Never or rarely puts YOU first; 4. Makes fun of you, calls you names, or makes you feel threatened or belittled; 5. Does not treat your parents courteously or talks about them critically or with contempt (after all, they are why YOU are here in the first place).
For me, one of the most important things was to know that my MOM approved of the guy that I would marry -- so something interesting happened when Grampie asked me to marry him. Read on:

The Grass In Spring -- A Delightful Thing

Random Photos

These are just random pictures of some of the very precious children that God has added to our family. How we thank Him for each and every one -- oldest to youngest (and their parents, too).

Every Child Loves a Zoo

To Grand Manan and Back

Jonathan Joins Our Circle

One Of Those Special Moments

It really was a very special time for your Grandfather, Uncle Jonathan, Uncle Brian, and me.  We had worked hard clearing up brush and unwanted logs at our site on Cary Lake. It was the fall of 2011 -- late October. It was well into the evening.  The moon was full, the air was calm. Except for the crackling of the fire and the soft tone of our voices, there was little else to hear as we enjoyed the unusually warm night and the fires. We had four of them burning that night. 

It was a night for thinking about the value of family and time together with people that we love. It was a time to be enveloped in the peace of a perfect night. We cherish such times.  

The light from those fires remind me that Jesus said we are to be as lights in this very dark world. One time we were in Luray Cavern in Virginia and as the guide showed us the amazing formations, we came to a large space and he stopped us. He said he was going to have the lights turned off so we could experience total darkness. The lights went off and there was no glimmer anywhere. The darkness was almost palpable. I moved my hand in front of my face but could see nothing. It was total blindness and it seemed to even be a little hard to catch my breath in such dark and "heavy" air. Then after a moment he said he was going to strike a match so we could see how effective a little light was in a totally dark place. It was amazing. I could see features from a few yards away. We all began to murmur over it because we were so astonished.

I tell you this to remind you that Jesus said we are not to hide our light, but to let it shine. If you are ever tempted to think that your good deeds, your kind words, your prayers are of no value, think again! Those things stand out brightly in this troubled world. People all around you are hurting and they need to know that somebody cares. Maybe you can't fix their problems, but you CAN care. As someone wrote on facebook recently, "one person can make a difference -- or at least try." How true!